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  • NegBox 3:24 am on October 26, 2010 Permalink | Reply
    Tags: , , IRC, Rant,   

    You’re About to Get Screwed, and You Know It 

    In one sentence for my ADD friends:

    We are increasingly playing in someone else sandbox, and the limits are starting to show and suck.

    FaceBook

    Largest site on the web. In the future, forget about having a blog outside FB – who will bother reading it when they’re too busy reading the ones already inside FaceBook? Its funny how the pendulum swings – AOL used to be as neutered as Facebook and it died a lonely death, now many of the the same concepts come back in Facebook.

    Here’s a thought: Let’s create a distributed trust protocol so we can build a Facebook outside Facebook and fuck Facebook in the Face.

    Twitter

    Huge platform seemingly derived from an IRC service. Some very many years ago IRC was all the rage, we had channels starting with hash # tags, and nicknames and pretty much Twitter without the Twitheads at Twitter. Then IRC died a lonely death for mainstream users – all that’s left there is – for the most part – some die-hards and the royal scum that controls the underbelly of the beast nobody wants to see… bot-nets, pedos, creeps, worms, distros… Its the Mad-Max style nuclear wasteland of the internet. … Then along comes Twitter and the pendulum swings again. They call it microblogging – WTF? It chatting, people, chatting – and all your chats belong to Twitter.

    Here’s another thought: Let’s create a federated chat protocol and layer it on a web interface… Isn’t that one done yet?

    Google

    Remember Altavista? Yeah, I didn’t think so. I’m not sure what is worse – having your content belong to Facebook, Twitter and others, or having the index to your content belong to them. Not only do they determine what gets found and read by the results of their searches, they directly determine what gets purchased when and where – they control the flow of money. I don’t think they’ve realized this yet at least not in a way that is noticeable – and frankly, I don’t really expect most folks reading this to understand how really big numbers of really small things work (scientific fact, most folks are too lazy to think like this) – Google has greater potential influence over the economic outcomes of the US and half the planet than any Illuminati conspiracy theory ever even conceived possible.

    Monopolies suck

    I suppose they suck especially bad when you’re not the owner of the monopoly. I also suppose if the monopoly was mine, I’d be telling everyone how I’m going to bring “Peace and order throughout the galaxy“.

    In closing, nothing – I don’t have any super-stellar words of wisdom here other than: This party ain’t over yet, so bring Vaseline.

     
    • CTRtard 7:02 am on October 26, 2010 Permalink | Reply

      “…so we can build a Facebook outside Facebook and fuck Facebook in the Face.”

      LOL. But I humbly suggest:

      “…so we can build a Facebook outside Facebook and fuck Facebook right in its fuckin Face.”

      I dunno… maybe one fuck was enough?

      Nice post. Google is taking over the world. They even own my phone.

      • Slave Rat 9:24 pm on October 26, 2010 Permalink | Reply

        Good catch. I must have been in a mellow mood yesterday.

  • NegBox 7:17 pm on June 3, 2010 Permalink | Reply
    Tags: Rant   

    Bitches in Business vs Inferiority Complex Short Dick Men 

    I’m trying to figure out what I hate the most in my daily business life:

    1) Ultra-competitive pussy-flashing ladder-climbing bitches

    or

    2) Little short dudes with type “A-hole” personality and inferiority complexes.

    I’ve got news for the #1 bitches – Statistically speaking, you’re fucked. I’ve got news for #2 dickheads too… Statistically speaking, you’re also fucked.

    I’m not really cut out for the politicking bullshiticking. Here I am… Raised like a prince.. What happened? Ended up the person who makes it a sport to point at the elephants in the room, who want to breaks all barriers and cut through your programming… and I’m supposed to be politically correct and play the game. F-that biatch, I want to see you drop your jaw to the floor and storm out the room in indignation hopefully never to be seen again!

    Ah… My daily dose of frustration… Why I even care, I’m not sure. Oh, yeah… I remember why I care. I care because the bank owns my house and my employer owns my health – They have me by the balls quite literally.

     
  • NegBox 4:34 pm on May 11, 2010 Permalink | Reply
    Tags: , Rant, TV   

    Live Happy, Live Free, Fire Your TV 

    I pride myself in having cancelled my cable service over five years ago. I’m not really TV-free – I have more TVs than people at home – but there is no cable or satellite signal – only our server with movies and series we want and whatever the kids watch online sometimes.

    The benefits of shutting out the mega-fuckheads coming through cable have been enormous. One of my favorites is being able to easily see the techniques used in advertising – by underexposing myself and then watching some ads while in a waiting room, like right now.

    I still remember what happned – I had the full cable package, high-definition DVR with multiple HD recording, all the channels available… And I would spend the only 20 minutes I could watch TV managing the space in the DVR!!! I got fed up of skipping ads, managing space, recording shit … Such a bad model. I just cancelled the whole thing. The first week was a little weird, then life resumed as usual, without the TV fucktards coming through with interruption marketing and backwards distribution models.

    Live happy, live fee, fire your TV.

     
  • NegBox 1:37 pm on April 26, 2010 Permalink | Reply
    Tags: , , Rant   

    I Hope Google Chokes on an Antitrust Investigation Soon 

    For some reason, I’m slowly becoming more and more bitter towards Google. It all started nice and well – I loved the Prince Valiant air of the early days. These days, though, I’m going deep into Negative Sentiment Override and I’m seeing everything they do as as either self-serving, manipulative or aggressive.

    The real trigger here is that I’m pissed they charge “API Fees” to advertise with them using anything but their crap. If askjeeves.com charges API fees, they screw themselves. If lycos.com charges API fees, they screw themselves…. When the dominant (90%+) market player charges API fees, they screw YOU. Catch the difference?

    Their latest Blah post includes:

    Introducing preferred AdWords API pricing
    The Google AdWords API allows developers to build applications that interact directly with the AdWords platform. Agencies and developers of search engine marketing tools use these applications to manage large AdWords campaigns more efficiently and creatively.

    Today, we’re announcing preferred AdWords API pricing. This gives qualified Google AdWords Certified Partners who manage client AdWords accounts free use of the AdWords API based on managed client spend. To apply, agencies must have an active agency profile page and be compliant with the AdWords API terms and conditions. We’ll evaluate applications for preferred AdWords API pricing based on the criteria listed here.

    We hope preferred AdWords API pricing will encourage agencies and developers to experiment with new strategies, expand the functionality of their tools, and build more comprehensive client campaigns without worrying about increased costs. You can learn more about preferred pricing and how to apply at the preferred AdWords API pricing site.

    What does this mean? The ones with the big bucks get the big breaks – that isn’t news for anyone, is it? It just doesn’t fit the image of the goody-two-shoes Google: Rob the little advertisers to give the big ones a free ride – all under the auspices of lower cost of maintenance of the relationship and larger business scale.

    Oh, so you guys are looking for feedback? Here it is: Stop screwing the small advertisers! I’m starting to regret having given them the power I gave them, even if it was just an ounce of power to a Kiloton machine.

     
    • Chris Zaharias 2:15 pm on April 26, 2010 Permalink | Reply

      You got it all wrong, my man. Small advertisers' growth in spend over the years has been so anemic that it's the single biggest impediment to Google's continued growth. The 3rd-party SEM tool providers have never been able to apply their tool to SMB campaigns because the API charges have been prohibitive. Properly-built SMB AdWords campaigns have extremely high API cost / ad budget ratios.
      My recent post Is The Pareto Rule An Understatement in SEM?

    • Mike Chiasson 2:57 pm on April 26, 2010 Permalink | Reply

      Hmm I took this one as leveraging an intelligent SEM's account to share the CTR pricing on to their other customers.

      For example if you have an ad that has a 8/10 quality score, it will cost more cpc than a 10/10. Part of that determination of quality score is CTR.

      Since SEMs probably nail more 10/10s than a small business owner, chances are their client's ad can be rated a 10/10 with the increased CTR as opposed to being say a 8/10 from their regular account.

      Still bullshit. but thats the way everything works to give incentives for people not to do it themselves. Saves google time from having to respond to emails (not like they do anyways). Health Insurance companies have done the same thing for years, you get it yourself its more expensive than if you signed up with a group of young people.
      My recent post The March Numbers

      • negbox 6:05 pm on April 26, 2010 Permalink | Reply

        Mike, I think we're talking about different stuff – The API fees are what they charge to access your campaign using third-party tools – Like Tracking202 Pro. Unless I misread their guidelines, they already use quality scores to move your cost-per-click up and down. I seem to remember a video from Google explaining that.

        Your conclusion is still right, though: Google wants to scale by not spending that much money supporting small advertisers.

        Step back for a second and think about that model… Its the exact freaking opposite of the successful Web 2.0 businesses, which finance themselves with the top of the food chain and enable the long tail. You can't entice the "Long tail" advertisers by slapping them with fees!

  • NegBox 5:07 am on April 14, 2010 Permalink | Reply
    Tags: Grief, Kubler-Ross, Rant,   

    The Five Stages of Rat Race Grief 

    Scientists have identified the emotions that permeate the weeks of Rat Race 9-to-5 white-collar ass-to-the-leather work. They align perfectly with the Kübler-Ross model – more commonly known as the five stages of grief.

    Stage 1 – Denial
    Onset: Sunday Afternoon
    Typical Thoughts: “Tomorrow will never come. This afternoon will last forever. Monday isn’t happening. Is it 2012 yet? Maybe I’ll die in my sleep tonight”

    Stage 2 – Anger
    Onset: Monday Morning
    Typical Thoughts: “Why am I stuck in this piece of shit job? These people suck and I have to work for them! Agh! I hate this”

    Stage 3 – Bargaining
    Onset: Tuesday Noon
    Typical Thoughts: “Maybe I can take Friday off. If I can just take Friday off, everything will be fine, I can get through this week. ”

    Stage 4 – Depression
    Onset: Wednesday Mid-Morning
    Typical Thoughts: “Its no use – I’ve got meetings back-to-back. I won’t be able to take Friday off and it looks like I need to come in on Saturday to finish those TPS reports – my life sucks. I should just quit and be a beach bum, or move to the mountains and live off nature. ”

    Stage 5 – Acceptance
    Onset: Friday Morning
    Typical Thoughts: “Its Friday!  I can get through just a few more hours of this. I can do it – Just a little longer and I get to be Freeeeee!”

    Rinse-and-repeat some 50 times during the year, some 2000 times during your lifetime, and when you’re done you get to have dinner at IHOP with the senior menu… at 3PM.

    Life doesn’t suck, it bites, it chews and it spits out!

     
  • NegBox 2:42 pm on April 5, 2010 Permalink | Reply
    Tags: Instant Messaging, Monday Sucks, Rant   

    New Fucking Instant Messaging Rule 

    Do NOT send me a mesage that says “Hi” .. Followed by “Can you chat?”. I am only available for the things that I give a damn. For everything else, there’s WankerCard.

    It is especially annoying when you have something important to say to me, like: “Your pants are on fire… On National TV, and the producers of South Park called and they want to portray you as a homo getting banged by Mr. Slave“.. and you let the chat window sit there, waiting for me to say something back. How stupid is that?

    And it is also annoying when you’re just trying to figure out if you can catch my attention for something you know damn well I don’t give a fuck about, and see if you can use personal relationships as leverage.

    To paraphrase Nicholson: Either way, I don’t give a damn! STATE YOUR FUCKING PURPOSE.

     
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