The “beat poem” was already priceless – The animation takes it to 11.
Question 1 of 2:
Can you spot the odd one out from this group of banners that returned from a query on WhatRunsWhere?
Question 2 of 2:
Now that you passed Test #1, comes the hard part. Test #2. Can you find the odd one out of THIS screenshot:
How many times have you seen a movie that you think about every single day for two months straight?
This is easily the best movie I have ever seen.
People blessed with ADHD simply watch this trailer and move on
Mr Nobody tells a story the way I personally view reality.
I’ll be brutally honest here: I’m putting my money on 98% of people not being able to grasp half the concepts the movie is based on. That shouldn’t keep anyone from enjoying the pretty pictures, though – its a beautiful film every way you look at it. Now that I’ve finished insulting everyone, lets move on to the movie…
Mr Nobody shows the life of a person who:
Here’s one of Nemo’s main choices:
Like the movie’s main character ‘Nemo’, I will play in my mind dozens of possible outcomes and try to figure out the likelihood of each – I hope lots of other people do this too or we’re fucked. Years ago when dating and creating an online profile I had to put up a “range” of ages I wanted to date and match against, I sat down for a few hours and ran through my mind the most likely scenarios of what would happen with women of each and every single particular age, that way I could determine how low and how high I would go… Of course I don’t do this when choosing the flavor of my next ice cream – for big deals like that, its worth it to think and decide. Just like Nemo does with Jean, Elise and Anna.
Which brings me to another interesting area of the movie: Decisions. Nemo has a very hard time choosing – he seems to want to make a perfect choice, and given that that is extremely difficult, he hesitates and tries to stretch the amount of time where a decision remains potential and unrealized – by NOT choosing. While personally I do quite the opposite – I do it for the exact and opposite reason the movie shows – to remove potential and bring reality – its amazing to see and imagine what life would be on the flip-side.
What also struck a chord was the idea of clearly identifying decisions. I call them simply “decision points” in my life – and I keep a close eye on my decisions – I also make sure I clearly identify if a decision is in the past, present or future and act accordingly – Unlike Nemo I can’t remember the future so I guess my best and try my best – However I sometimes screw up on purpose – If I could only really control myself.
The movie does not at any point explore the ideas and implications of simulated realities – That would have probably been one twist too many. There are passages that look surreal and hint at all of the reality we have just seen being in the mind of the child trying to make a decision about which parent to go with. He seems to choose none, runs off to a field and blows on a leaf – literally using the “butterfly effect” from chaos theory to alter the events of his life years down the road.
There are loads of things Nemo does in the movie that I sometimes do myself. This made me feel not-so-crazy. Every couple of months I’ll sit quietly in a particular place in a particular park and try to imagine what my future self would tell me if he could speak to me. Then I imagine what I would tell myself if I could speak to myself in the past.
There was one bit of the movie which boggled my mind for about three weeks: Why did they open the film with an explanation of Pigeon Superstition? … Just to say “what did I do to deserve this”? – that opening needs no pigeons.
Pigeon superstition is in every human being – Ever heard of cargo cults? Religion? Well… What if… What if what we hold as basic truths – from gravity and throwing a ball up and having it fall down, to every part of our existence was our own interpretation of something outside of our awareness and comprehension?
I’m not talking about bearded gods and flying saucers -I’m talking about being too retarded to understand the very nature of our existence. That seems a lot more likely than a deluding myself the epicenter of the universe.
When I mix pigeon superstition, many-worlds interpretation and static time what I get is the idea that even the most basic of our assumptions about how the world works and how causes relate to effects are perhaps nothing but our limited interpretation of something entirely beyond our comprehension. Some (like Pauli) have pointed at a complete disconnect between causes and effects, with the only relationship being synchronicity as we perceive it and nothing more. Which had always brought to my mind the question of why am I experiencing this reality and not another one? And is there a way to move to a different one? What is my consciousness? Does it even really exist? What is the meaning of being alive in a deterministic universe? Does it even make sense?
Ah… Most everyone else already has all the answers – You know… Zodiac signs, gods, rules, natural laws, etc, etc — Meanwhile I’m still looking for the right questions. That’s why Mr. Nobody strikes a chord with me. It spares me the answers and gives me more questions in an amazing format.
1. My mother taught me TO APPRECIATE A JOB WELL DONE.
“If you’re going to kill each other, do it outside. I just finished cleaning.”
2. My mother taught me RELIGION.
“You better pray that will come out of the carpet.”
3. My mother taught me about TIME TRAVEL.
“If you don’t straighten up, I’m going to knock you into the middle of
4. My mother taught me LOGIC.
” Because I said so, that’s why.”
5. My mother taught me MORE LOGIC.
“If you fall out of that swing and break your neck, you’re not going to
the store with me.”
6. My mother taught me FORESIGHT.
“Make sure you wear clean underwear, in case you’re in an accident.”
7. My mother taught me IRONY
“Keep crying, and I’ll give you something to cry about.”
8. My mother taught me about the science of OSMOSIS.
“Shut your mouth and eat your supper.”
9. My mother taught me about CONTORTION-ISM.
“Will you look at that dirt on the back of your neck!”
10. My mother taught me about STAMINA.
“You’ll sit there until all that spinach is gone.”
11. My mother taught me about WEATHER.
“This room of yours looks as if a tornado went through it.”
12. My mother taught me about HYPOCRISY.
“If I told you once, I’ve told you a million times. Don’t exaggerate!”
13. My mother taught me the CIRCLE OF LIFE.
“I brought you into this world, and I can take you out.”
14. My mother taught me about BEHAVIOR MODIFICATION.
“Stop acting like your father!”
15. My mother taught me about ENVY.
“There are millions of less fortunate children in this world who don’t
have wonderful parents like you do.”
16. My mother taught me about ANTICIPATION.
“Just wait until we get home.”
17. My mother taught me about RECEIVING.
“You are going to get it when you get home!”
18. My mother taught me MEDICAL SCIENCE.
“If you don’t stop crossing your eyes, they are going to freeze that way.”
19. My mother taught me ESP.
“Put your sweater on; don’t you think I know when you are cold?”
20. My mother taught me HUMOR.
“When that lawn mower cuts off your toes, don’t come running to me.”
21. My mother taught me HOW TO BECOME AN ADULT.
“If you don’t eat your vegetables, you’ll never grow up.”
22.* _My mother taught me GENETICS._*
“You’re just like your father.”
23. My mother taught me about my ROOTS.
“Shut that door behind you. Do you think you were born in a barn?”
24. My mother taught me WISDOM
“When you get to be my age, you’ll understand.”
25. And my favorite: My mother taught me about JUSTICE
“One day you’ll have kids, and I hope they turn out just like you”
NegBox and Eric are discussing. Toggle Comments
I’m clearly in the wrong area of marketing. Talk about epic advertising.
TIP: Go full-screen, High Def is the only way to watch boobs falling from the sky.
Here is “The making off…” .. Even more tits and ass…
This is from 2008… Watching boobs fly never gets old for me.
Ryan Buke is discussing. Toggle Comments
Lets see who can spot where I fucked up, changed the landing page and went to bed ASS-uming everything was just fine.
I have Ryan on Twitter and sometimes I wonder what kind of glue he’s sniffing – whatever it is, you have to recognize he’s got talent to brand himself to the point he can be recognized by the writing style and even the glasses!
Ever since I removed that plug-in that allowed me to punch in posts from the front page like it was a real-time chat, the amount of posts has gone downhill.
We can argue the quality has gone up…
One of the reasons for this blog is that I hate Twitter’s 140-char limit… So this doubles as my twitter stream. Lately, it hasn’t done much for me. Time to call it in.
Truth of the matter is, I don’t give a fuck about post counts, quality or visitors (yeah, sorry about that – nothing personal) . This is my creative outlet, so I’m bringing back the short-form-blog style posts.
Just so I keep myself focused, I’ll start by backlinking to my all-time favorite worthless and useless blog post on this blog: http://negbox.com/crashing-bed
Being a former engineer and current marketer I can vouch for the accuracy of this cartoon. Years ago I thought anyone could do what I did – I was dead wrong.
Now I don’t know why the guy hates sales. Sales is dinners and lap-dances. There’s only one rule to remember: You can’t expense the lap dances.
If you’re heading towards the corporate ranks, grab this Douchebag Dictionary and memorize it. You’ll be a corporate douchebag in no time at all!
Every area of life has its own lingo… The cube farm is no exception.
Here’s an excerpt:
I want to make sure we cover everything we need to in this meeting, but I have a hard stop at two p.m.
Due to rightsizing, we’ll be eliminating 50% of the department. We still have the same deliverable targets.
There’s a marketing team skull session tomorrow on the fallout from having Mel Gibson as the celebrity spokesperson for the new product line.
Here’s a ten-step guide to developing a killer social media strategy for your company.
We are actualizing synergy amongst team members directly related to the project.
If you are really headed to cubefarm, here’s a video sneak peek at life behind the suit: Endless conference calls.
It was a dark and stormy night… I couldn’t sleep.. It was 2:00 AM.. The house was quiet. I went downstairs and fired up the Xbox 360. My favorite game, Fable 2, had lost its luster… Then I saw it… Limbo…Available for Download.
Limbo is an amazingly creepy, gruesome and fun platform puzzle game. I’ve played it to the end – only 5-6 hours – but I made sure I only played it at night. The atmosphere of the game is simply amazing, the sounds draw you in, and the gruesomeness of some of the parts… Well… Makes it interesting – It did take me a while to get comfortable (and not have my heart jump) with the little boy getting decapitated, impaled, crushed, electrocuted and eviscerated so frequently.
This is really a very unique game – and the atmosphere of shadows, shades, and despair it creates is amazing. Check it out.
IGN did a nice video review of Limbo
A few screenshots:
One day I will go into how I play games and why I always cheat at videogames.
I love sandbox-style games where you go wherever you want… Right now top of mind is Fable 2. Fantastic game – I think one of the best characters is a class of ‘monsters’ called the Banshee. The banshee has a raspy voice and will scream/whisper demoralizing phrases that strike at your heart. Some of my favorite phrases:
Some folks are simply fucking brilliant, like Yale Fox.
Talk about testing – this time the patterns of how people move and buy drinks in a club depending on the songs played – to balance fun and revenue. Brilliant.
His blog is a journey of discovery – Did you know Barry Manilow had been WEAPONIZED? You give Aussies a spoon and they give you a tunnel, give them Manilow and they give you Armageddon.
Interesting article on the Optimal Price for Drinks in Different Demographics. What also blew my mind was the existence of a Journal of Addiction that has been in publication since 1884.
I certainly didn’t know that drinking bull pee could be beneficial for anything – but it seems Red Bull helps with the symptoms of Vodka intoxication… Well, some.. It makes you feel less drunk – but does it make the ugly chick in the corner look ugly again? Didn’t think so.
Ah.. the science of Hedonism – bring it on!
Looking for a video marketing company I bumped into this children safety video billed as “creepy”… Well, its actually pretty damn good – and creepy enough to be remembered.
Now… Wanna see something scary? Really scary? How about Ronald McDonald telling kids that he is an exception to the child safety video above?
PS: If you’ve ever wanted to do something to a kid that their parents would object to, do everyone a favor and hang yourself with the nearest extension cord. Feel free to leave a note saying you read it on negbox.com – I could use the publicity.
They could make a feature-length movie out of this idea:
Couldn’t help noticing the Brawndo shirt. If you don’t know what Brawndo is, you’re like stupid or somethin’… ’cause its got electrolytes and shit.
Awesome 3-minute summary of LOST in video
Now I don’t have to waste even one more minute to understand what people talk about… Especially since the story is pretty retarded regardless of the execution.
I have an RSS feed that uses a Google query for my name… And no, my real name is not “Slave”. Every day I get random stuff from Technorati in that feed. I don’t quite get it – It seems that Google is picking up my name as part of the post tags! My name is nowhere to be found when I get to the article, however… In this case that’s a real relief.
I couldn’t resist an entry with my name in the tags, titled “Scareware Scumbags Facing Fraud Charges” – For a moment my heart stopped – I thought they found me!
Its about a $100M scareware fraud… I love how the article ends…
Unfortunately, the two guys that ran the main operation, Bjorn Sundin and Shaileshkuma Jain, live in the Ukraine and Sweden respectively. In really nice houses. Where they’ll probably be able to hole up watching movies and snorting coke off of hookers’ special places until they die.
The article does highlight how you have to think globally in everything you do… No matter how legit it is.
Mike made me realize my bosom babes were going out on the RSS feed - Its a long and irrelevant story, but essentially I managed to get babes showing up from a really big list without a timeout and without going crazy with hash tables – mind you I haven’t done any real programming in years, so this wasn’t as easy as it looks.
I’ve taken the babes off the posts themselves and integrated them into the theme – I’m using Headway – The best theme I’ve even seen after searching for a very long time. It has some really nifty hooks and I’ve just hooked my “babe insertion routine” into the “After Post content” hook. Slam-dunk, now the babes appear at the bottom of every post randomly… They probably refresh (new image) every time you refresh the page unless you’re getting a cached page from the server or somewhere in between.
Now go crazy!
Not really, but if it works for fake review sites, might as well work for me.
From now, all posts will get a randomly-selected (via a really simple script) girl attached on creation from a pool of a little over 11,000 images. The images all come from met-art’s webmaster promotional materials (so there will be no donkeys crapping on transsexuals, sorry) and link to met-art using my affiliate code pointed at the “low price” offer – I signed up to the CCBill and this site’s referral program. Nice. Interesting to see that I could pick from two different price points for the people I send them. I really don’t expect much, but hey – its experience.
The remarkable bit that I just hinted at is that if you used this link, when you get to the signup page, you end up paying $29 a month for the length of your subscription. If you follow this other link, you pay $19… Then if you followed this one you’d pay $9 for the first 15 days, then the standard $29 a month. This means I could fine-tune depending on traffic source – brilliant!
The “Price” is one of the infamous “P”s of Marketing – which are anywhere between four “P”s and fifty-seven trillion “P”s, depending on who you ask or what book you grab. The first time I learned the “P”s there were five… Then when I took classes on Services Marketing with Sultan Kermally it was seven Ps… Anyway… I’ve yet to see this idea at a network level, though. It would be very interesting if a (small) network had variable marketer-selected pricing – The offer would have a minimum, no set maximum and somewhere on your link you’d be sending in the price – which would get picked up by the offer as well as the network upon checkout. Any model other than one where the price can vary by target is most likely leaving money on the table.
Agh… This site looks so bland… I’m going to spruce it up a bit somehow. I’ll take it well outside the domain of “Safe for Work”. Since I work from home, its all the same to me… and frankly, I don’t give a shit.
In the interest of appearing fair, I will submit this to a voting. Take a close look at your preferred picture by clicking on it and I’ll count the ‘votes’ soon.
Watching this video was the best six minutes of Wednesday. Whoever did this little video must have been peeking through the keyhole.
Type in any URL here: Geocitizicer to make it look like a 1996 geocities page. I suggest hiding the address bar and playing a good prank on an unsuspecting non-techie… Really funny how far “The Web” has come… Does anyone remember using gopher too? Am I a dinosaur? Don’t answer that last one…
I wonder if anyone would object to me booking my next trip with this airline:
I hear rave reviews.
When folks walk behind me in my workspace they usually go “WTF?” I have a 4:3 monitor in Landscape mode, and a 19:8 monitor in Portrait mode (kinda the opposite of what you’d expect). My main browser runs in portrait mode and is the only thing on the portrait monitor. Other browser windows go in the other monitor along with all the other crap.
Here’s a quick snapshot of my browser (blurred) in the middle of a day… Note the gazzillion tabs – I was doing research on offshore hosting.
I was just sitting outside and noticed the yellow film of pollen on the patio furniture… Then it dawned one me… This is plant jizz… Nice, real nice.
Booking business travel. How hungover am I going to be the morning I’m returning?
Let’s re-frame the problem more accurately: “If I book an early flight, will I crash asleep so bad at the hotel that I’ll miss the flight?” or better yet, “Will I be having so much fun it takes five bouncers to drag me out and I regret the early flight?”
Having worked in corporate Sales, this video struck home when I saw it a couple of years ago. Its simply hilarious. Just got a memo from the Rat Maze Overlords saying something about not taking customers to “indecent entertainment” or some other euphemism… In other words: Folks, don’t take customers to nightclubs or brothels – depending on your location.
Meanwhile… Azoogle wants to take everyone to the PlayBoy Mansion for a “Job Well Done” or a “Well Done Blow Job”, I’m not sure yet – Jeremy sure has a big grin on his face in this picture.
Boy… What a stark contrast!